Well, sometimes you plan to have all kinds of great holiday content pre-planned and ready to go the moment Black Friday hits. You just KNOW you’ll be super organized and on top of it, JUST LIKE ALWAYS AND WHY ARE YOU LAUGHING LIKE THAT?
My goal was to plan content for the entire month of December, well in advance. And by “well in advance,” I mean November 29th, because apparently I DO NOT understand my actual personality or my organizational capabilities.
But, as The People Who Make Up Cheesy Quotes once said, Life is what happens when you’re busy making plans. And I’d just like to rephrase that in a way that feels more authentic:
Appendicitis is what happens WHEN YOU’RE BUSY MAKING PLANS. x
Y’all. THIS IS WHAT WE HAVE ALL BEEN TRAINING FOR. And pushing & shoving for Black Friday deals is so 2003, guys. Light a fire, throw on that Snuggie, and get your holiday shopping DONE like the shopaholic, I mean, BOSS that you are.
I’ve scoured the internet for the BEST Black Friday deals around. These are my personal favorites, as you may notice by the fact that I’m wearing two of them in the photo above (hi sherpa jacket and white boots!). You know what’s really fun? To watch them go WAY on sale AFTER YOU BUY THEM AND WEAR THEM ALL OVER THE PLACE.
Guess what y’all? It’s apparently already #BlackFriday. (shhhh don’t tell the stores #Thanksgiving hasn’t happened yet. They don’t need to know that.) It seems like the sales start earlier and earlier every year, and I AM HERE FOR IT. I say, let’s give lots of thanks, while also scoring lots of deals. For which I will give thanks. See how that works?
So, because I love you guys, and because I want to help you (say it together) save money by spending it, here are my top five ways to make the most of #blackfriday and #cyberweek.
You know how, when Nordstrom has a sale, you never know about it? Because no one on social media EVER mentions it?
*rolls eyes so hard they fall out of her head.
*Picks them up and puts them back in again, because it is my mission and duty to make Nordstrom love me, buy one of every thing, give John a heart attack, I mean, INFORM you guys of important ways to wreck your credit score.
You know how you sometimes accidentally on purpose buy all these dresses, because you think your life is fancy. And then, you remember that YOU ARE NOT FANCY. And that you only buy dresses because they will probably make you look just like the model wearing them. (Spoiler alert: They won’t.)
Anyone else? I mean, it’s like my brain forgets for a second that 95% of the time, I’m reaching for sweats, OR sweats that masquerade as real pants. (Looking at you, joggers. And thank you for your service.)
Someone once told me, “blondes should never wear yellow.” After a SAY WHAT, followed by a HOW DARE YOU, it became my mission to find a flattering yellow for blondes. Specifically, blondes who aren’t actually blondes, and who also have the skin tone of a piece of notebook paper.
Anyway, I love yellow and all it’s iterations, but every time I reach for it, I hear that little voice reminding me that blondes can’t pull off yellow. (Coincidentally, it’s the same little voice that likes to remind me that I’m NOT a size 2 and that I’m NOT in my early 30’s.)
Sometimes you wanna Pinterest up an amazing, creative Halloween costume that impresses all of Instagram, I mean, YOUR SWEET CHILDREN, who, have apparently "always wanted a fun mom that dresses up for Halloween."
Good to know.
But then, other times you just wanna justify those new moto boots you bought. Or that camo jacket you’ve been eyeing. Or the red ringmaster coat that a certain someone said was too “extra,” but you just KNEW that one day there would be a highly popular movie about a musically gifted dreamer who opens his own circus. Or ya know. Something like that.