Hey y’all! You didn't think I’d leave ya hanging this Anniversary Sale, did you?? (and please just ignore the fact that this is my first blog in 2020, mkay?) I sort of expected my 40th year on earth to be a total dumpster fire, but that’s another blog in and of itself. But just let me say, um hi, 2020? YOU CAN GO AWAY NOW. Also, I miss you, 2019. And you weren’t even all that amazing.
Read MoreOkay. Deep breaths. This is what we've trained for, people.
*cues Olympics music, wins gold. In her mind. #itsfine
Not only has Early Access to Nordstrom's Anniversary Sale started, it is also Amazon Prime Day. It's like that bomb cyclone storm thing, except on your wallet. #funforall #exceptforjohn
First of all, to shop the Anniversary Sale right now, you're gonna need to get a Nordstrom credit card. And I know, I know, you're certain that the minute you do, creditors will be calling and your credit score will automatically drop from 800 to 300. BUT, if you have actual boundaries, and even a minimal amount of self-discipline, then none of that will happen. Probably. Maybe. Seriously though, here’s what you do
Read MoreThere are SOME PEOPLE who will actually be GLAD when the Anniversary Sale ends tomorrow. These are obviously crazy people, who wouldn't know a good deal if it smacked them in the face. Or was hypothetically delivered to their doorstep via the kind folks at UPS. You know who you are. JOHN.
Read More...is the worst. The end.
Just kidding. Mostly. But I'll bet some of you #girlmoms will relate so hard to this post. When our daughters were babies and toddlers, it was REALLY FUN to dress them, right? Whether you were into smocking or skinny jeans, cold shoulder shirts or big bows, it's like playing dress up with a cute doll. One who cries, poops, and throws tantrums. yes. But a doll who will at least wear what the heck you spend your cash money on, because DOESN'T SHE KNOW PEOPLE PAY YOU TO DO THIS??. A-HEM.
Read MoreNow, I'm not saying I have favorites among my precious anniversary sale purchases. Except that I do. I totally do. And can I tell y'all a little secret? Almost none of those favorites ever come from Round One. Year after year, it's ACTUALLY my ROUND 2 (or 3...or 4....) picks that end up being my go-to staples. (You'll know which ones are my faves by the way you see them many days in a row, without regard for societal norms and things like cleanliness.)
Read MoreLet's be honest guys, there are WAY MORE than 5 things from the Anniversary Sale that I LOVE AND ADORE AND WANT TO COME LIVE WITH ME FOREVER AND EVER AND EVER.
(Because I am obviously excited about the #nsale at what is a completely normal and emotionally stable level.)
Despite being the worst at narrowing down a list, for you guys, I can do it. I came up with FIVE. Five things that are probably selling out as I type these words. I'm looking at you Rag & Bone circle bag that was in my cart on it's merry little way to checkout, and THEN GOT STOLEN FROM ME by Super Speedy Susan, who was more organized, quicker with her card, and who is also fake but it helps me to blame someone, okay? #actlikeitsnormal
Read MoreAs we speak, the Sale That Shall Not Be Named is about to commence. You may know it by it's other name: The Sale that Causes John to Twitch Every Time A Package Arrives. Clearly, I'm referring to Nordstrom's Anniversary Sale. And since it's the most wonderful/annoying time of the year, I wanted to share a few of my tips and tricks to shop the sale LIKE THE BOSS THAT YOU ARE.
Read MoreNothing strikes fear into a mom's heart like an all white outfit. Because, KIDS, y'all. Kids have an internal radar for anything pristine, and will basically find, seek, and destroy.
They will use Cheeto fingers.
They will use mud and/or dirt.
They will use snot and boogers.
They'll use things I haven't even considered yet, because THEY ARE TINY SAVAGES
Read Morey'all, let's be for real here....it's the LAST DAY of the Nordstrom Anniversary Sale, and the ENTIRE INTERNET BREATHED A COLLECTIVE SIGH OF RELIEF.
I know. I KNOW.
BUT, I do feel it my bloggerly duty to force one last roundup upon you for old-times sake. And it's gonna be EPIC.
Read MoreGuys. I hope you've hydrated and stretched properly. Let's bring this bad boy home, shall we? Rounding up a few of my CURRENTLY STILL IN STOCK (and possibly also in UPS boxes headed to my house) anniversary sale favorites.
Read MoreGotta admit, when I first saw this dress, I was all "Britney Spears called, and wants her Baby, One More Time dress back."
BURN.
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